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A Contentious Relationship

July 16, 2009

Recently my wife and I celebrated an anniversary. As a part of our celebration, we went shopping at a hardware store. We intend to do some work on our home in the upcoming months and were excited to look around and brainstorm about the possibilities for our project.

At one point it became clear that about one issue we were not going to see eye to eye. She said something like, “I guess we’ll have to argue about when the time comes.” I reached out my hand and, in the manner of sporting competitors before a game, shook hers, saying “I look forward to the battle.”

A few days later she told me that that was the happiest and most memorable moment of our anniversary celebration. I guess that’s just the way we roll.

It hearkens me back to our first date, which was a blind date set up for us in college by some of our mutual friends. We started to get into an argument about a social issue on our college campus, and she stopped me to say: “Look, are you sure you want to do this? Do you really want to get into a fight about this?” In her mind, this translated as: “I’m not going to lay down and submit to your view like the other, conservative pushover girls around here—don’t start dishing it out unless you can take it.” I did, in fact, decide I would like to continue, and we got into a pretty heated debate.

She thought I would never call her back—most of the college men on our campus didn’t like women with “opinions.” As we’re celebrating our anniversary (we’re into our second decade together), you can imagine that I did call her back. We’ve had many an enjoyable argument since.

Happy Anniversary to my sparring partner!

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3 Comments leave one →
  1. July 16, 2009 11:57 am

    As someone who also has a partner who loves to argue, I congratulate you!

    Some of our funniest times can be an argument, but also, if there’s a real problem at hand, we often get a lot closer to each other. And we inevitably learn more about each other and our relationship.

    Years ago, I never imagined I’d say it, but I love fighting with my girlfriend.

    Peace,
    Brad

  2. July 16, 2009 12:30 pm

    I never met a boy who doesn’t like girls with opinions.

  3. John permalink
    July 16, 2009 10:39 pm

    Congratulations! My own anniversary was just 11 days ago.

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